Thursday, September 26, 2013


So last week I had my chicken dance down to an art and got myself into a load of trouble... Sigh.  Not a good week last week....

I did give my husband some blogs to read, but it took a trip over his knee first.  I usually do change very well, but this possibility of change for some reason just really freaked me out.  I mean it is not like our marriage was broken and flapping in the wind or anything... So if it's not broke, why fix or mess with it was my point of view.  So once he got through my thick head it was not fixing but enhancing our relationship that was his/our focus, I chilled out.  I think since we just started our relationship with him taking me in hand, we just never talked about it... It was just the way it was/is.  So now actually talking about how our relationship works is very interesting and honestly I feel even closer to him now... Which I never felt far away from him before all this, but now we are just even closer, if that makes any sense.

My husband read the blogs I sent him and he got really ambitious and found several more.  He has actually turned me on to several more that I am having a blast reading!  So lots of reading going on in this house at night.  :0)


So we now have actual rules... Yes, we do!  Before it was just sort of a respect and safety thing, cross either line and we end up having a "discussion".  (He calls it that, not me.. I don't think me being over his knee getting spanked while he tells me why I am there is a discussion at all... Thank you very much!)  This came out in one of our talks last weekend, we had LOTS of talking last weekend.  Two way talking so in my opinion those were discussions.

Now we have some rules that we both agreed on together after LOTS of talking (negotiating).  We basically talked about what bothers me in our relationship or what he does that bothers me and then flipped it to his feelings on our relationship and my actions.  We both ended up with lists of things to work on and we are going to check in weekly to discuss progress.  Only a few things on my list turned into actual rules.... I think they are the ones that drive him most batty.. Like when I run through our house and clean the night before the cleaning lady comes drives him and the kids crazy.  He called last year and got me a cleaning service to lower my stress and take the burden off me.  Only it has created more stress because I run around like a mad person cleaning my house every Thursday night and screaming at kids to pick things up.  Sigh.. Yes, I am a nut!

He is also going to include some new consequences to rule breaking as well, which I am all for by the way. No corner time, we both agree I am way to hyper to stand still for any amount of time. But loss of privileges seemed like something that might be effective.  We shall see...  :0)

We are now going to have weekly "reconnects", we got that from a few blogs.  I have never been spanked other than for punishment so this is going to be interesting.  Not sure what to expect, will have to see this weekend what happens.  He is still reading blogs like a mad man, so more ideas may arise... But for now this is what we are doing.

So now to the really good stuff... Our sex life has gotten REALLY, REALLY and I do mean REALLY amazing in the last week.  We were just plain boring before, not that either of us knew that until this last week and stumbling into this AMAZING blogging community.

So from the bottom of our hearts, we thank you all so very much for sharing your lives and experiences to help others like us figure things out!!!

Irish Lucky...


  1. OH this is a GREAT post! Reconnection spankings...(don't mean to toot my old man's horn...but I do believe he was the first person I know who started calling it that a year ago). LOL. He didn't like maintenance and role affirmation didn't fit our situation. Of course someone else could have said that somewhere off in another corner of blogland that we have never been..LOL..This place is HUGE!

    For *us* one of the greatest things about R/A ( reconnection appointments in our case) is there is no pressure. At the start of our ttwd, he would ask me questions, pain levels, positions, implements. It really helped both of us get to know my body and its responses better~ without him feeling like I was controlling the situation. WE both learned a lot, and still do from them.

    Good luck!

  2. I gave him your blog to read and am pretty sure we took it from your hubby! :0) So thank you and him for letting us borrow your name. My hubby also loves the Wilma and Barney thing, he said he knew watching that cartoon as a kid those two fit better.. HA!

    I am just now realizing how huge this wonderful blog land really is!!! My hubby was a busy beaver, he has me following 10 more blogs now. Crazy fun! To think I was scared to share this with him, he loves it. Total shock.

    Our first R/A is Sunday, so cross your fingers it goes well.. I am nervous, but am hoping for a pressure free as you put it experience. :0)

  3. Gah, after I wrote that, I couldn't believe I did! Sheesh...LOL

    Anyway, tell your hubby ( um no need to get pushy here, but ya kinda need to give him a know someone we can cheer and jeer at..LOL) some days I wonder if Wilma and Barney do fit better together! Kidding.

    I shall be thinking about you on Sunday. I remember the first time, we had r/a after a LONG time, I said to Barney, " I'm scared. I don't know what to expect and I'm nervous, it won't 'work'" He said, " Me too"

    ( oh while I am suggesting and getting all bossy, you may want, if you feel comfortable putting your gmail address here. Over the past year, I have had people who are too shy to comment publically reach out and give me support and suggestions via pressure though)

  4. You are awesome! I have added my email address now and my goal for the weekend is to name my man. Thanks so much for your input, you are my blogger Yoda! :0)